5 Practical Ways to Support Your Emerging Adult During the Empty Nest Transition
The house has felt quieter lately, with no backpacks by the door and no late-night chatter. You might have been savoring the calm, but does an emptier nest mean your role as a parent is over? Not at all. In fact, your emerging adults still need your support, just in new and different ways. If they’re visiting you for the holidays, or they’re home for an extended break, here’s how you can continue to help them navigate this exciting, sometimes challenging stage of their lives.
The emerging adults in your family are adjusting to a lot of changes. They might still be making new friends, learning to use the laundry machines at their new places, and settling into new routines. Moving to a new environment can be challenging, and they may reach out to you for support or share their feelings. While you may feel confident about how to support them, it's completely normal for many parents to find this transition challenging.
This stage of life is new for all of you. Your sons and daughters are not quite teenagers, nor fully adults. They’re trying out new roles in relationships, exploring career options, and discovering their identities. That makes it an exciting time. It’s also a challenging period for them and for you as you learn how to support them.
Before we discuss specific strategies for supporting your sons and daughters, let’s take a closer look at what they are experiencing. In 2000, Jeffrey Arnett introduced the term “emerging adulthood” to describe this age range from 18 to 26. In his influential work, he pointed out that this stage differs from adolescence and young adulthood, as it’s a time when individuals freely explore their identities, especially in matters of love, career, and worldview.
Since then, researchers have examined this stage of life more closely and reached some interesting conclusions. First, it’s a period of exploration. If you talk to 100 young adults about their dating lives, careers, and plans, you'll hear many different stories. But one thing they all share is that they’re still figuring things out. Most people ages 18-25 say they don’t quite feel like teens anymore but don’t see themselves as fully adults either. They often say they’ll feel more grown-up when they take responsibility for themselves, make their own decisions, and become financially independent. Interestingly, they don’t view adulthood as linked to getting married, having children, or holding a specific job (Arnett, 2000).
It's important to recognize that this unique stage of life is common in industrialized societies, having gradually emerged as a distinct phase in places where more people pursue higher education and the average age of marriage increases. Since it’s a relatively new part of life, your experiences and those of your parents may have been quite different from those of your sons and daughters. If you hear your parents say something like “back when I was their age, we…” and then finish with things like we got married sooner, had children earlier, or got a job and stayed with it, they’re probably right. Things were quite different then compared to now. But that doesn’t make one better than the other, and it doesn’t mean your son or daughter is being indecisive or will run out of time to settle down.
Understanding what your emerging adults are experiencing can help you tailor your support. They’re exploring identities, relationships, and careers while learning to manage responsibilities. With that in mind, here are five practical strategies to guide them and you through this transition.
Take care of yourself first
You’ve heard the saying, ‘You can’t pour from an empty cup.’ This transition affects you too, so prioritize your well-being. When you model resilience and growth, you give your emerging adults permission to do the same.
Listen more than you talk
Listening is powerful. Reflect back what you hear so they feel understood and supported. Sometimes, being heard matters more than being advised.
Encourage responsibility and decision-making
Emerging adults see independence as a marker of adulthood. Give them opportunities to practice—like planning a family meal or managing a small budget. These experiences build confidence.
Avoid comparisons
Social media makes comparison easy—and harmful. Remind your emerging adults that everyone’s path is unique. Pressure to ‘keep up’ can create unnecessary anxiety.
Connect them with resources
Expand their support network. Introduce them to trusted professionals, financial institutions, or faith communities. These connections help them build a strong foundation for adulthood.
Emerging adulthood is a season of growth, exploration, and change for your sons and daughters and for you. While it can feel uncertain at times, it’s also an opportunity to strengthen your relationship and support their independence. By caring for yourself, listening deeply, encouraging responsibility, and connecting them with helpful resources, you lay a foundation that empowers them to thrive. Remember, your role isn’t to chart their course but to be the steady base, or the bow, that launches them forward with confidence. Embrace this transition as a chance to grow together and celebrate the exciting journey ahead.
